I find myself toiling back and forth between my polar opposite streaming thoughts…
“You’ve gotta be successful, with perfect facial symmetry; rich enough to save the world and escape the destiny you were born into!”
“No! You’ve got to abandon materialism, cultivate your spiritual power and be one with the ways of the universe!”
Still yet, somehow I find myself checking instagram 10 times a day and wallowing in my self pitying misery, sulking over flawless plasticized female bodies, muttering about hand dyed and sewn couture gowns and tripping on visual acid scrolling through #consciousness.
We all do it, we all take that sinful peek into the sickeningly hilarious yet offensive, #pillcosby, laugh at the drag queen parodies and envy the Maldives vacations of the 1% babes. But why? Why am I willingly giving away countless valuable moments in thought, moments that could be spent cultivating a new skill or talent or finishing that last detail on my new website…. Why? Desire, that is indeed the culprit of disaster.
The new age and the fantasma surrounding the ever prevalent symbolism overload has forced us all into greedy, shallow, sulking, narcissistic drones. But alas, the latest trend hath risen! Imagine putting your phone down for 30 minutes or more at a time, to become accomplished on your own accord, to applaud yourself and twirl in your, not so couture gown.
Every waking moment in life doesn’t have to be based around looking #selfie ready, (I rather despise that word honestly). Filters and extended skin perfecting apps, makeup contouring and waist trainers have polluted the sense of realness among women and set fire to our beliefs and realization about our own beauty and worth.
I don’t recall being born with a fully contoured face and a dazzlingly chic blowout, so why can’t I accept myself for my own image; and beyond that, my intellectual capabilities and talents? I’m too focused on desire, what I don’t have, and polluting my mind with trepidatious looping thoughts of how I may not meet the standards of the doctored imagery that is nearly killing my soul.
But wait, how about we all take a moment and realize the moments surrounding us all? The beauty in that given instance of reality and the true taste of life through a biological lens, exciting all of the senses. When a calm moment is stolen away for ourselves, devoid of all remnants of jealousy and obsession (the usual culprits of my instagram obsession demise) we see within ourselves that we are perfect, in our own altruistic, individual way.
Without the workout videos, without the latest tips on how to become a Kardashian clone, without those ever so haunting perfect getaway luxury vacation posts from miserable sugar babies across the globe. Each and everyone of us can realize and remember that we have a talent, a gift, a contribution to deliver not only to society but to ourselves!
Not one MAC clad I vixen is Instagram perfect in reality, it’s merely an illusion that many often forget. Well, remove the blinders, you’re imperfect on the road to self cultivation on the road that is perfectly imperfect and tailored just for you; do yourself a favor and just put it down.